Spiritual Growth Blogs

Longing to serve

I long to serve with every ounce of my strength…
I yearn to LOVE in a way that is free of self-preference and self-preservation.
…. And that takes physical, emotional and spiritual strength.
It means eating well.
It means working out daily.
It means strong relentless boundaries with toxic people.
It means praying and protecting myself every morning before I pray for others.

Wealth desires & God desires: what’s the truth behind it all?

Are our desires ego-driven shallowness????
Are they God’s guidance?
Am I meant to be led by them? To deny them????
HERE IS THE MAGIC I’VE COME TO UNDERSTAND ABOUT THEM…
“I trust my desires are right.”
We begin here. RIGHT HERE is where this adventure begins.
And I do… I truly trust my desires are RIGHT desires now… and it’s like a 1000 lb weight lifted off of me.

Freedom in grieving

Sometimes I just grieve.
Grieve the broken families.
The kids suffering.
The loss of innocence in our culture.
I feel it so deep in my bones…
And I let myself feel it all and cry, ache and break.
And I feel the deepest yearning I’ve ever felt inside… wishing I could create a safe space for everyone… an INNOCENT place for everyone.

Feeling unworthy and insignificant to God…

I have felt profound unworthiness every time I tried to feel God’s presence… and sit in meditation…
And to my surprise… I realized that UNWORTHINESS is nothing but ego.
It is simply more self-focus.
“I’m this. I did this. I didn’t accomplish that.” Yada yadda.
And each time I remind myself of this quote: “Instead of focusing on our flaws… focus on God’s Love.”

Neater. More linear. Less messy.

I’ve always wished that I could be more graceful in my journey…
Neater. More linear. Less messy.
Less drastic changes.
And sometimes I really feel like something is wrong with me when I see my peers being the same. Same. Same. 10 years later… the same.
And… through this I’ve come to embrace the craziness as I realize that it is this way because I outgrow myself 100x a year.
Like most of you, I come from a long line of trauma.

#morningLOVErant

I can’t believe I get to do this whole human thing…
I mean… what were the chances I’d be able to be born a human and do this?????
What an incredible gift!
I’m so blessed that I can’t even begin to comprehend it…
I choose to feel God’s love pouring through my veins.
I choose to feel the UNENDINGNESS of the LOVE… the countless ways I am loved… the extraordinary possibility of drawing nearer to this LOVE… ahhhh!

Can we be peaceful without being walked all over?

I’ve come to fully understand that
PEACE is the goal….
But we MUST define true peace… the kind of peace Jesus called us to in Christ’s consciousness.
Peace is not agreeableness.
Peace is not passivity.
Peace is not leaving things undisturbed…

Dark night of the Soul

… where you feel disconnected, lost, and unsure of your path… a time when old beliefs and ways of being fall away, but the new hasn’t fully emerged yet…
My old friend lol.
This sacred space is so challenging… I fully understand why most of humanity avoids it… numbs it and stays attached so deeply to their current sets of beliefs…

Is “DESIRE” ego… or a powerful spiritual practice?

This has been a wild one y’all… but I have finally landed my feet on the ground after a major awakening. I’ve never appreciated being grounded so much in my whole life.
Ok… here it is…
I’ve come to understand that manifestation out of ego is a sense of … what can I get next that feels good? Desire.

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